Yummy

Feeling delicious in my bed all snuggly, just turned the fan off bc its actually chilly in South Florida, its so nice I LOVE this weather! February in Florida is my favorite, its actually cold but bareable. I went to a free yoga class in downtown FTL and the breeze blew the most beautiful breeze right at my face at the end of the class. She was good, Carrina, I liked her flow a lot. Ive been going to Bombay Yoga w Michelle shes really excellent but tomorrow I will be at Zen Vida hot yoga class at 8am. Its another full day! And so much more to do that I cant even get to, its always like that tho! Ah! The move is still affecting me. I have to take out everything from my closet and do a whole new review to donate/spring clean soon! Im in my new lil apt, its perfect size, the downsize served me well. im much happier w less space to clean and worry about and no roommates… just was crazy w the whole warehouse bc so much stuff, there making my art but how can I make art and sell art? No seriously, explain that to me? So I just pivoted and said Fuck It! Ive done enough of this! Im an expert at this and if its not making money like it was Im gona learn some new skills and take better care of my own damn self … AND WHA? Lol. Im so glad I did. Ughhhh! What a relief! What a weight to come off me! My whole worry to servive just suddenly dessipated I was like wait, u mean im still gona survive without working my ass off like a slave? And Boom! There I was suddenly in peace like learning new ways to live life all over again. Learning how to care for me FIRST, learning how to love myself and my things and who the hell I am. Just learning about my desires for Gods sake! What do I really want to do? How does that look like…. And then having an interest in others of course…. Thats part of my healing too! Community Service at Salvation Army and Voices for Children and pulling weeds w an elderly woman for no hours, many things for no hours!!! But I did them anyway bc I knew helping others was filling to my soul. Me asking for help and nobody serious enough showing up in Miami, so unreliable I tell ya… just so over it! I started helping others bc i knewww what it felt like to be in need of help and how it feels when someone good actually helps and I did it for friggin free… and thats not how it went when ANYBODY helped me, I compensated. But it feels good to have changed the course direction and switch it up a bit. I love myself for it. Ive really bounced back. I even bought a bird! Never thought Id get a bird but I did, shes my new pet and I love her. Her name is Paloma. When I was young like 4th/5th grade I had a friend named Paloma and we got along like w side pony tails and big Ts riding bike in Cocoplum LOL, its like I forgot about her but thats how u say dove in Spanish so the white peace dove I got is a symbol of where Im at… i originally wanted to set her free now Im just still deciding… bc I think she might need me. Shes in captivity… wings arent clipped. I let her fly around my apt the other day and maybe not a good idea lol. I was warned. I want her to fly tho! Then I learned that they grow back if u clip them. So not sure. Paloma is by the window w a great view, a mirror too, a couple perches and I added some card board bc I learned some about Pigeons online and i even leave her birds on TV for her to watch while Im gone. Still so much to learn! They are used to release at weddings and celebrations and that I thought would be cool til someone said she will not survive if I let her go. I dont want her to suffer so they might be right… i picture her getting eaten by an aligator lol, not funny but its just what I picture. Poor Paloma! Shes a Queen! Mi Palomita. Wish me luck w her! We are really happy, just the two of us. Xoxox