Momentum

Why is my breathing deeper than most? Lmao wait, stop, I can’t even do this.  my big deep breathe and even hold it while somebody barely even breathes… what is wrong w ppl? even when I ask them to breathe w me… they do but they didn’t go there… DOES IT MATTER?

 I heard somewhere that when I truly LOVE I will stop asking why… maybe bc I won’t care to know why anymore. So fucking pissed.

Syllables. Sounds, what if they mean different things? Bc they do so much. Energy, meaning, not only energy but the manifestations are tied to visualizations. Dude, I’m sorry,,, did I not already say that? What is fucking wrong w ppl tho? Ugh it’s so hard to express… I want to be a walking prayer, a better understanding of the past, I am to outgrow the old and do the new but by having my own opinion. 

My dog Roxy is so sweet and amazing. Since she was little I have been preparing myself for the reality that nothing lasts forever, hate to say it. Why do some things seem so real and far fetched? Like a baby out of my vagina is just unreal now. Cuz it’s not a clear thing. I feel like a little bit of a waste of a person if I don’t get to be a mom… 

Whatever it is, it’s my love… w no place to go! 

So funny right? I can’t breathe