Happy...

I'm gona have to sit down with all my notes from the past few days of #docsGetReal a convention for documentary filmmakers I attended with my mom. Today was the last day and then I took my mom to eat at RAW on Santa Monica Blvd, she was in such a good mood that it made me feel happy, she loved the food and ambiance even though we were practically the only ones there. I thought that was strange!! How could that place not be doing better? I now want to do Julianos Raw cooking class. So yea, you take a bite and it has this journey of flavors in your mouth and you allow yourself to slow down and really appreciate the combinations of things and how they make you feel and how your mouth waters and how it almost speaks to you! Then your own body cells... I can almost hear them say Thank You! It's a delightful experience, the way food should be more often. I also now want to tutor Spanish LOL I know it's pretty random but I speak perfect Spanish, I mean, perfect! I might make a grammatical spelling error or not know the waning of a difficult word but it's all in me since Spanish was my first language. I grew up in Spain my first 8 years before moving to London where I learned English. I'm typing into my phone quite fast and in the total dark as my mom lightly snores next to me, she's in town til Monday. Also, Roxy lays diagonal by my feet. I need many different sources for my income to be coming in BC I'm an artist and not everything I spend my time doing makes money. I'm trying to figure this out pretty heavily now, I don't pay my own taxes and DONT even talk to be about my expenses and what I pay for rent. It's like I'm 16yrs old in a 30yr old body. They have a new movie coming out staring Keira Knightly about that LOL I gota see it. So I'm working on getting my online store set up perfectly and carry new brands that I can advertise and market. I want to pay for THAT and help promote things I like and that would be nice to do for friends. It's been a learning experience and I feel confident about it, I will figure it all out myself as I have been already doing, I'm not scared of THIS. I am more afraid of rejection than failure I think BC I know I can't fail and it's just a growing process. I have all the tools I need to succeed I am looking for better friends and partners to join forces with. I am an idea machine and nothing an stop me. So the website is progressing, the styling is a side thing because it's really hard on my body and I don't needi care about to do free work unless it's a collaboration worth my time. I rather not. I would need to find an agent and I haven't even started looking! If I get an agent it's styling gigs more often but is that REALLY what I WANA do? It's a side thing. I also sell KANGEN water filters, it's an ionizer for the water to transform into its pure natural powerful state and rid the flourise and chemicals in our running tap water. It was improved my insides, my skin, my feeling, it's like having rusty pipes in your body with regular tap water and with KANGEN it's drinking a high alcaline antioxidant water instead :) so You should get one from me! ;) I also make jewelry... I am designing samples of arm-bands with secret pockets and looking again for a new person to make them for me. I need it to be a very high quality product and I've gone through so many people and spent so much money on this it's been so darn difficult but I am still here with it and have tons more things I want to design and work hand in hand with people who can help me create these things. I make necklaces, unisex bracelets are finally up on my site! Www.tammystees.com I am really enjoying using my hands and experimenting and it feels good to make wearable art pieces and people to buy them off me by bringing a few to a party and selling them to people I meet. I would LOVE to get an internship with a fashion forecasting company and get my feet wet with heavies that do what I think I am talented at. I'm obviously trying to do lots of things and they are all things I like doing... I also have an idea for my next movie which happens to be another art piece so... Sooooo... Where does the money come from? For me it's not so much about theoney but I mean I like spending it so how am I supposed to have a way to get by? To pay rent, travel? Have kids? Pay their college? Retire? This isn't looking up! How is little me, lil crazy me, lol free spirit ME supposed to really make enough to say, invite U to dinner? It's an occurring thought in this brain... It's a true story, it's not a joke, it is what it is and I'm admitting it! Well, how are you doing it? Most ppl I know aren't either! Many are BC they went the right way and now are maybe a lawyer or a surgeon but I don't WANA be them LOL. No. So imagine how many God damn bracelets that would have to be?! Lol. I'm full of talent but I need some business minded friends to help me. I want to have a real store one day... It's not just a store, it's an art gallery & cafe! I have the vision and hopefully the discipline to keep it all together. SURE I'm unpredictable! But that's the predictable part ;) I wana keep things fresh and moving and exciting! I care about people, the environment, I love fashion, I was a concious venue, an inspiring place, the place I want to go when I want to go somewhere... It doesn't exist and I want to create it. So, for now. I'm preparing for that... It might take me 10 years but I will be getting myself the friends and experiences I need to feel like I have the best plan of action and team too make my dream happen. I will also need your help :) I want your help today adk tomorrow and the next to give the world a positive thought whenever u can and pray that this happen because it's also yours, it's not only mine, I want to be a part of something great to give it to you! To help us all succeed, to unite us all, to share laughs and health! To do the right thing for the world, bring awareness to issues and make it easier for us to make a difference in the world. To make a change. To make you and me happy.