https://www.biddytarot.com/tarot-card-meanings/minor-arcana/suit-of-cups/five-of-cups/
I drew this card and it could not have come at a better time for me. I have been feeling this sense of remorse for all the nonsense that I have written here that isn't to help make the world a better place. It was just self expression and something for me to analyze. I haven't been going to a psychologist or on any medication and I have allowed myself to heal, I have passed through the healing,,, still haling but I am very proud of where I am now. I can't even tell you,,,, I am happier than I have ever been. I have e deep sense of peace, understanding and even love for myself that I never had before. Its like I stopped swimming against the current and Im just in more of the flow of life. I don't care who has left me, it was all part of the process and I now consider myself a HEALER. I have reached a place of knowing and of higher vibration that has filled me with love and acceptance.
I drew this card and if you read it, it might help you too. As you can tell I am very spiritual and like to take in and interpret the signs of my angels and any guidance I get. I always sign up to classes and go alone and read things that fill me with spiritual guidance and I have been through the dark and now I can see clearly and the people who are in my life now (mostly) are the true ones that need to be here. Some of the not so good ones have been of help to get me here so I am grateful for them too.
Its like a heavy weight has been lifted.
I am Happier than ever before, more sober than ever before and the self medicating I do is under control and this is what I know. I am not 100% sober yet but I am not drinking like I used to and I am more in control of my choices. I am the Goddess I am trying to be,,, all in the making and I aim high for myself. Its peace and love baby,,, its going to exude out of me and heal others that I come into contact with. I am who I want to be in this theatrical stage we call LIFE.
I am so happy that the angels heard my prayers and felt my feelings and gave me the answer. I am finally past those shitty people that only put weights on my ankles and had me ferociously swimming up for air, for my life. The illusions. The sadness. it's gone.
Im weightless and free and at peace in my own beautiful soul universe. I am rich with love. I am clean. I am happy. I am TAMARA. I am TAMMY. I am TAMBONITA. I am TAMBONATION. I am ME.
